Nicaragua Adeventure

I needed a little time to get my thoughts together for this post...and let’s face it...all-inclusive resorts are not exactly conducive to writing due to all of the top shelf liquor...but I digress.

We signed up the day before our trip in the hotel with Swiss Travel Services. The trip was advertised as an all day 12 hour trip to Nicaragua with stops in the town of Granada, a boat trip on Lake Nicaragua and a trip to the Masaya volcano. It sounded amazing so we signed up.

The bus met us at our hotel at 5:30am sharp...sadly before the cappuccino bar opened. :( But we were the first ones on the bus which meant we could pick the best seats. Trust me when I tell you that the cool kids on the Nicaragua trip sit in the front of the bus, not the back. I know all of you have been told repeatedly that the back of the bus rules, but when you are on an all-day journey, on twisty, windy roads it is way better in the front. And there was a bathroom at the back of the bus which we were advised that we “could only go #1”. Even so, you can imagine the smells and nobody needs to sit by the bathroom on a windy road with the smell of urine enveloping you. #justsayin

Our guide was awesome. He told us that his name was Dennis, but only because it was the only name tag he could find that morning, so that would be his name for the day. I already liked this guy.

Dennis was very knowledgeable about all things Costa Rica and was telling us all about what we were driving past as we made our way to the Nicaraguan border.  One of my favorite stories was about iguanas. Apparently, iguanas used to be called “the chicken of the trees” because Costa RIcans used to eat them. Iguanas are not a popular menu item anymore unless you really search for them. Luckily we did not have to partake.

We arrived at the Costa Rican/Nicaraguan border and let me tell you...it was a little like traveling in China during Chinese New Year...well...maybe not that bad. But all my years living in and visiting China prepared me for this moment and this type of border crossing. Dennis urged us to vamanos off the bus so of course Sam and I vamanosed as we saw how long the line was. We first had to leave Costa Rica, then get back on the bus and enter Nicaragua. The suckers who sat in the back of the bus took their sweet time and ended up at the end of the line #smh.

After about 1.5 hours, we were next in line to get our coveted stamps. Then, of course a local lady, seeing me as the weakest link and that there was a gap in the line tape, broke in front of me. Usually I am ready with my elbows, but she caught me off guard and I was not fast enough. Next time, I’ll be ready! #elbowsout

Sam moved the line barrier tape so that no one else could break in line again and the whole line got a good chuckle. #ohthosecrazyamericans

So once all of the slowpokes were back on the bus, we drove to the Nicaraguan border. This time Dennis took all of our passports into the border patrol office and we stayed on the bus and/or shopped at the little booths outside of the border patrol office. I offered to “help” him (make sure no one stole our passports), but he said it would be better if we stayed on the bus or went shopping. I told him to remember that our lives were in his hands.

Sam and I got off the bus and bought some coconut candy and other weird candy. I’m still not sure what it was but it would tide us over until lunchtime.

Finally Dennis came back with a border agent who handed us back our passports. I was amazed at how laid back the border crossing was.

Before we left the border, we picked up our Nicaraguan guide. His name was Elvis (uh-uh-huh) and he was full of himself. He talked kind of like the old televangelists and always wanted to get some kind of crowd response from us. I felt a little bit like we were in church on a bus...not in a good way. It was a tad annoying but entertaining none the less. I missed Dennis, but he was riding up front with the driver...I guess he needed a break from talking. So we listened to Elvis tell jokes and quiz us.

We drove for yet another hour or so and passed several volcanoes finally ending up the the historical town of Granada. I had no idea that there were so many volcanoes in Nicaragua or Costa Rica for that matter.

We ate lunch at this little boutique hotel and then walked around Granada for a while looking at the the old churches and architecture. We have had a lot of experience in the past with beggars and have seen folks that are truly hungry. There were 2 boys, probably around 15 that were totally trying to scam the group. One of them stuck his head in the window while we were eating and rubbed his belly...mind you, he looked very well-fed.

Then when we left the restaurant to walk around the kids were on us like white on rice. I thought Sam was going to fight them as they kept trying to grab our hands, my purse, and put their hands in our pockets. I smacked one their hands and my elbows were at the ready, but luckily I did not have to use them. The best thing to do in this situation is to tell them firmly to go away, which we did. Another guy in our group thought he would be a good Samaritan and give one of them some money...of course then he was swarmed by a group of them. Luckily he got away although I hope he still had his wallet.

Granada was a beautiful city! You can still see the smoke stains on some of the building from where William Walker burned it down in the 1800’s. I have a pretty awesome coffee-radar, and Sam and I found a yummy coffee spot and I had a mocha chai latte. I know it sounds weird, but seriously...Starbucks you need to put this on your menu...yummo!

#becausegilmoregirls

that lady totally photo bombed my shot. I was trying to get those massive doors!

So then we loaded up on the bus and drove to Lake Nicaragua; the largest lake in the region. Apparently there are sharks in this lake near the river that feeds from the ocean to the lake. Luckily we did not see these sharks.

Notice how my vest is totally fastened, while my hubby likes to live on the edge

Yes, that's a volcano

Lake Nicaragua is huge and has 365 small islands (some of them for sale). Our boat driver’s name was Guillermo and he lives on one of those islands with his family. In fact, we rode by his island and saw these cute kids waving at us...not really...they were waving at their dad.

Guillermo showing us a crazy flower

There was an island with a howler monkey on it. I’m not exactly sure how the howler monkey got on the island as I don’t think they swim, but apparently she never leaves the island and depends on the kindness of tourists to feed her...so of course we did.

There were all kinds of animals on these little islands. There was one goat I took a video of because he kept crying and pacing like he was begging us to get him off of the island. So sad.

After the boat trip, we high tailed it to the Masaya Volcano as the park was about the be closed for the evening. By some divine intervention (according to Elvis), we were able to get into the park and able to hang out around the volcano much longer than they usually allow you to. Masaya is an active volcano and because it had just rained and the sun was setting, we had a great view of this massive volcano. We could see the red hot lava gurgling in the depths. Elvis asked for a sacrifice volunteer, but sadly none of us were eligible so the volcano gods will rage another day.

Check out the video Dennis took with my phone through binoculars....mainly because I am a big chicken and did not want to fall into the volcano.

What an amazing day! We ended up in a little village to see a crater lake, which we couldn't see because it was dark #fail. We then said goodbye to Elvis and loaded up to go back across the border into Costa Rica. Another longish border crossing mainly because the border guards were moving slow as molasses, but they were probably just tired like we all were.

Then we had to drop off several groups at two different resort locations...oi. The trip in total was about 18 hours...such a long day! But it was totally worth it even though we were tired and all of the restaurants were closed when we got back to the resort. Thank heavens for room service! (#allinclusivesrock).

So this was my long-winded way of saying that if you have a chance to do a day trip to Nicaragua from Costa Rica, DO IT! But just know that you are in for a super long and tiring day.